Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Having a hard time

I'm here to admit it; I'm struggling. I haven't completely fallen off the wagon, but I've had some pretty big snafus in the past week. It's just easier to neglect the blog when you have to admit failure. But, in the long run, that's seriously bad news!

Why did it happen? I could blame one of any number of things. Wanting to enjoy my weekend with my husband, who I'm trying to mend my marriage with. Celebrating a visit from my Florida grandparents and feeling bad turning down her cookin'. Baking in the 90 degree humid-as-heck apartment with no a/c (ice cream is mandatory in those situations, no?), and simply wanting to give in and agree that Fourthmeal is a real thing.

But none of these is an excuse. Joy for the moments I am eating does not make up for the disappointment I am feeling in myself. For the tummy ache and the anger at the scale. Why must I torture myself, when I know that I'm happier and healthier when I'm eating right?

As a side note, I came home sick from the office today. Got there, everything was fine, but 20 minutes later I was puking in the bathroom. I stuck it our 4 hours before I got sick again. I have chills, I'm trembling, and flushed. I think I have the doggone flu.

Anyways, I'm back. Sorry for my weakness.

2 comments:

  1. Firstly, feel better. I just found your blog! This weekend was a train wreck for me as well. All we can do is take it one day at a time. Life is about living even when we have a journey to undertake!

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  2. I'm so sorry about everything you've been going through. Don't ever feel like you have to apologize for weakness, it is in every one of us! I hope you feel better soon and are able to get back on track, but even if you're not there yet I hope you're not being too hard on yourself.

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