Friday, January 28, 2011


Hard day today.

A wonderful, sweet older woman that I work with was let go. She was like a grandmother. I shared an office with her, and she encouraged me every day. She kept me on track with my diet. She counseled me in love and marriage. She shared her faith and her love with me; and she was cheated. I don't want to go into details... but needless to say, I had a hard day. After they pulled her out for a meeting, and then returned with a box and boxed up her things for her, I wept a little but mostly held myself together. I soon got up and went to the bathroom to dab my eyes and put my head in my hands for a couple minutes. Once my eyes had dried and my breathing had calmed down, I stood up to exit the stall and heard a splash. My ID badge and security card had fallen in the toilet.

I instantly let out a sob and the river flowed.

Talk about bottling things up....

Well, Darn It.

Weigh in this week? Gained .4 lbs.

How'd that happen? Long story. I ate well. REALLY well... with the exception of last saturday, when I ate my weight in hummus on my anniversary. But I also haven't done my 30 Day Shred, because we have contractors building a new bathroom in our apartment and they've taken over every room in the stinking place with their tools, tiles, bags, etc. No place to move :(

So I was dissapointed. But again, I'm movin' forward! Hubby said that he thinks I'm putting on mad muscle or something, because I'm looking visibly leaner in the tummy area. Booh yah!

Anywho... I have to get to the office. This week has been exhausting. 14 credits of classes, and I'm on 6 hours of overtime at work. Cheers to this workweek being OVER!!!

Thursday, January 20, 2011

My Bathroom is gone!!!

I've been positively gleeful all week.


Because I am getting a bathtub. It's the simple things in life, people. I'm one of those people that, if given the opportunity, takes bubble baths every night (complete with candles and a good book). However, I spent a year in China with only a standing shower.

And I found a cheap apartment once I got home last January...

With a teeny standing shower. I have to bend my knees to get my hair under it. However, our landlord loves us. He wants us to stay. And he called last weekend to inform us that we'd need to make arrangements for showers this thursday and friday, because he was having our crappy linoleum replaced with ceramic tile; and he was installing a TUB.

I've been grinning through my epic 4-hour accounting and Spanish classes, giggling as I work 8 hours on the same stupid report at work... and tossing restlessly in bed at night; thinking of how wonderful it will be.

Today, I knew that Husband was letting the maintenance man in this morning to begin. I assumed... two days of work. That means probably that the old stuff would be out today, and possibly I'd see a lovely new tub in my living room?

Nope. The bathroom was gutted. Walls stripped. floor ripped out. New particle board sitting loosely on the floor. Shower gone. Sink and shelving unit; gone. Toilet, sitting crooked on a pile of boards.

I saw Husband for two seconds after my class, before he left for work at 10:20 pm. He said only "I have a surprise for you".

Guess who is not going to sleep until he comes home at 3 am and tells me what the heck he's talking about?!

Anywho, I had a good week. Really good, actually. I love Weight Watchers. LOVE. I could stick with this for the long haul. I'm eating good food. I don't feel deprived. I did my 30 day shred workout... I even did an extra yoga/pilates video a couple days on top of it. I'm building abs under my flab!

1.4 lb loss yesterday. I'll TAKE IT! Do you know why? Because I feel muscles in my arms again :) And I climbed 4 flights of stairs at school today on a whim; and wasn't even winded.

My view has completely shifted. I am so much more focused now on FEELING good instead of specifically looking good. I love feeling like this. And now I can enjoy that bubble bath all the more...

unless Husband's surprise is that we are getting a brand new deluxe standing shower. Blech.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Nothing to turn my nose up at....

I went to my Weight Watchers meeting last night. The verdict?

I lost 0.2 lbs.

And I'm happy with that. Do you want to know why? Because I woke up at 5:30 every morning this week and completed the 30 Day Shred. I stayed within my points every single freaking day. I ate salads, and lean cuisines, and oatmeal, and fruit, and veggies, and drank green tea, and did bicep curls while watching Shark Week on Netflix, and started week 1 of school. And I'm putting on MAD MUSCLES. My tummy is flatter. My squats are getting deeper. My arms are firmer. I'm sleeping better.

The weight will start coming off. I just have to stick with it. And I'm going to, this time. This body is going on vacation. This body is gonna wanna carry babies within the next few years. This body is gonna wanna hike the Sleeping Bear Dunes this year without collapsing and giving up.

This body is gonna wanna wear SKINNY JEANS!!!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Baby Hippo

My mind is REELING. I think my cultural anthropology course is going to make my head explode... in a good way. It's going to make me think about things I don't want to think about; because they are just too confusing.

In the Nuer tribe, a nomadic group in southern Sudan, they react to babies born with visible deformities in a completely foreign way (to Americans). To the tribe, it is not considered a human baby. If the mother gives birth to such a child, it is thought of (and referred to) as a baby hippopotamus. This way, the baby hippo can be returned to the river where it belongs. It provides a way for the nomadic tribe, in which a person with such a deformity often cannot survive, or will suffer, with a softer way of dealing with the situation. The tribe, even the mother, does not mourn the death of her child, as they don't view it as a child. Anthropologists see this as a way for the tribe to react in both a realistic and compassionate way.

AHHH!!! What do you think of this? I hate it. But I DON'T hate it. I'm so confused.

Anyway, I have not died. I haven't dropped the ball on my weight loss. I've just been a busy bee! My second weigh in for WW is tomorrow. I'm excited to see if I've lost. I've done the 30 Day Shred every day, and I've done great with my points.

Food today?

-oatmeal (with walnuts, almond butter, and butterscotch chips)_
-salad (romaine, carrots, celery, green peppers, cucumber, chick peas, cilantro, and cottage cheese)
-Lean Cuisine (swedish meatballs)
-two apples
-60 calorie yogurt
-handful of nuts
-serving of wheat thins

AND I still have points for popcorn and a TSP of chocolate chips after class today.

Do you know what's funny?

My husband is doing my 30 Day Shred when I'm not at home. That's right... he's secure in his masculinity. Not enough to let me see him do it, but I'm not sure I want to. Jumping jacks and lunges aren't exactly hot.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

First Day of School - Epic Fail.

My semester starts today. Well, yesterday, technically - but only my online class, and I can do that anytime before next friday. What kind of college starts classes on a friday?!

Anywho, I'm taking 4 classes (13 credits). On saturdays, I'm taking Spanish 102. My instructor last semester told me "you use the same book next semester; don't worry about buying anything more". So I didn't. I checked online this morning, seeing as I'm going to class in an hour, and it says that I needed to buy a course pack for the semester - and have the first section completed before class today. Nope. Didn't do it. Don't even HAVE it. What a great way to start the semester. The bookstore isn't open - darn. I'll just have to be a slacker for the day, I suppose. At least I'm ahead of the doofusses that are always there on the first day going "My book will be here soon. I ordered it on Amazon last night".

I have a busy day today, so I'm posting my eating plan now. If it changes, I'll let ya know! I have class, followed by homework, cleaning, laundry, taking down the Christmas stuff, and then dinner at a steakhouse for my Grandma's 80th birthday!

breakfast: oatmeal. This was a fail as well. I accidentally bought quick oats at the store yesterday instead of old fashioned. Ick. So pasty and mooshy. Anyway, I then stirred in almond butter and 1 TSP of chocolate chips. It turned out horribly. I ate less than half and chucked it. I'm now noshing on an apple with cinnamon on it. YUM!
lunch: again... split pea soup. :)
dinner: (via online menu for the restaurant) 6 oz sizzler, sweet potato, steamed broccoli
snacks: grapefruit, another apple, glass of milk.

Now it's time to be a good little student and go attack that Espanol! Hasta la vista!!!

Friday, January 7, 2011

Ham Bones Are Creepy.

Today was glorious. You want to know why? Because I thoroughly enjoyed an average day. Yep - today was just average. And wonderful.

I had the day off of work today, just because. I woke up naturally at 9:00, which is 4 hours later than normal! I was refreshed and energized. I immediately chopped veggies and through the ingredients into my crock pot for homemade split pea soup. Leftover ham bones are amazing!

After getting ready for the day, I went to school and bought books for this semester. $390 later, I left and went to the grocery store. I stocked up on healthy fare for the next week. Salad fixin's, frozen meals, grapefruit, apples, cheese.

I walked into the door and smelled the soup. Mmmmm. I put things away and settled into the couch with an apple, string cheese, and my computer. The rest of the day was spent cleaning, watching Shutter Island, my daily date with Jillian Michaels, and preparing food for next week; lots of chopping!!

I feel strong. It sounds wierd, but it's odd using my muscles. I turn a corner, and I can feel my abs flex. I squat to pick something up, and I feel it in my calves; not pain, just... use. It's no wonder everything was harder a few weeks ago. My muscles weren't being used, and they had shrunk and gotten into quite a funk! Standing up straight was hard. I tended to walk with my toes pointed a bit out, because it was easier than holding them in. I feel GOOD.

We booked our excursions for our cruise. I'm getting soooo excited. Visiting Mayan ruins in Costa Maya, snuba in Roatan, Honduras, zip-lining and cave tubing in Belize City, and swimming with dolphins in Cozumel. This is gonna be a long 5 months, I tell you.

Today I ate the same meal twice. Deal w/it. It was delicious.

I ate 37 points... oops! One over what I should have. I guess it wasn't hard today!

breakfast: Carnation Instant Breakfast
lunch: Split pea soup (croutons on top)
dinner: Soup again. No croutons.
snacks: apple, grapefruit, string cheese, plain air popped popcorn, 2 TSP semi-sweet chocolate chips.

Have a wonderful weekend, lovelies. Keep your chins up!!!

Thursday, January 6, 2011


Is it supposed to be hard to hit your Points Plus for the day? With the new system, I'm supposed to reach 36 points a day. And it's HARD! I feel like I'd have to eat too much, or too much unhealthy stuff.

Most veggies (all except the starchy ones) are zero points.
ALL fruit is zero points.

I think it's gonna take awhile to get accustomed to this. I also think I need to go to the store. Here's my eats for the day:

breakfast: Oatmeal with walnuts, almond butter, and butterscotch chips

snack: yogurt

lunch: Healthy Choice Portabella Parmesan Risotto

snack: 100 calorie pack

dinner:2 eggs fried in PAM, mashed taters with just salt and pepper, and mixed veggies. Random, I know. Hey - it's what I had available.

snack: 3 cups airpopped popcorn with 1 TSP of semisweet chocolate chips and 1 TSP butterscotch chips tossed in while still hot.

before bed: 1 cup skim milk spiked with 1/2 cup Rice Nog

All of that is 34 points. I need 36. I even threw the chocolate and butterscotch in just because I was short! And if I fill myself with more fruits and veggies, it will still be zero points. I already had whole grains in two of my three meals. I guess maybe... cheese? I want my diet to be as natural and healthy as possible. I don't want to just eat the leftovers in chocolate or crackers!

swear I'm skinnier today. I always lose it in the belly first. My pants are looser today, and I just feel like it's flatter. Still not flat... but flatter.

I'd keep writing, but I don't wanna. Hubby and I are watching Die Hard, and my kitty is trying to get me to move the laptop so that she can sit on my lap. Have a fabulous friday!

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Points Plus, Anyone?

Yet another attempt at weight loss... I've officially joined the Weight Watchers cult. I've heard great things, and honestly, I need help. I've got 5 months to get in fighting shape for a cruise with my hubby in the Western Caribbean. Our last cruise was on our honeymoon, nearly 6 years ago. And I was 70 lbs lighter. Now, I'm not gonna expect to lose 70 lbs in 5 months.

But I do plan on weighing 180 lbs. That's 44 lbs in 5 months. 2.2 lbs a week. Ya get what I'm sayin'? I've gotta kick it in gear.

I've got my work cut out for me, seeing as I work full time in an office, sitting on my butt. The rest of my time is taken up as a full time student; sitting in class, sitting at school waiting for class, sitting at home doing homework. I need to be diligent with the time I have on the weekends; grocery shopping, food prep, housework; and I plan on sticking with my workout video in the morning before work. I can do it!!

Hey, do you remember MADD? Mothers Against Drunk Driving? They called me today. And it was a dude.

"Excuse me, could you spare a moment of your time? This is not an attempt to collect a donation." - Dude

"Only if it's very quick." - Me

"It is." Dude. He then proceeded to prattle on relentlessly about drunk kids and drunk driving and drunk mothers and drunk hamsters. The dude went on forever.

"Excuse me, sir, but I'm in the middle of dinner. I need to go." - Me

"That's why I asked if you had a minute. You said yes." - Dude. He then hung up on ME!

The nerve.

Anyway, today I finished day 4 of the 30 Day Shred. Here's my eats:

breakfast: oatmeal (with walnuts, PB, and butterscotch chips)
snack: yogurt
lunch: Sesame Chicken Healthy Choice Meal
snack: 100 Calorie pack
dinner: Pasta Primavera frozen dinner (I know... normally I don't eat two in a day. But I was busy.)
snack: grapefruit
drinks: 1 coffee, 5 glasses water, 1 glass of skim milk spiked with rice nog.

Points Plus? (the new program)..... 32 points. 4 less than daily allotment. :)

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

OOPS! Day 3. NOT 30.

After seeing Kyoko's congratulations about completing the 30 Day Shred, I realized I made a massive typo. I am on day 3. Not 30. Sadly. WOW... that'd be nice. Wishful thinking, I guess. But hey, at least Day 3 is done!!! *blushes*

For awhile, I am going to need to be babysat (meaning I am putting every bite that goes in my mouth on this blog).

breakfast: carnation instant breakfast

morning snack: 60 calorie yogurt (french vanilla) and a handful of mixed nuts

lunch: leftover brown rice and veggie stirfry

afternoon snack: 100 calorie pack of cookies

dinner: egg scramble (1 whole egg +2 egg whites, cheddar, spinach, and mushrooms) and side of mixed veggies (from a steam bag)

dessert: a piece of my hubbie's leftover marzipan bar from Christmas

evening snack: white grapefruit

drinks: 1 cup black coffee, 5 glasses of water, 2 mugs of green tea

Booh-yah. Just please forget that I ate the marzipan.

Walk of Shame.

That's kinda how I'm feeling right now... head hanging low, shoulders slouched, eyes averted...

Amy has been a bad, bad girl. Sorry, ladies. I've missed you. I've read you. I just haven't acknowledged you. I feel like a broken record. Again, I've gained it back. I used school and busy-ness as an excuse to get entirely too carried away; then the holidays came around, and I remember two days where all three meals consisted entirely of cookies and cheese.

The damage? Lots of pounds. I am up to 222 lbs. That's only 17 less than my all time high; and 28 higher than my low in China last year.

Sometimes I feel like I'm somehow sabotaging myself. In high school, I played tennis. Most of my matches consisted of me wiping the floor with my opponent in the first set; and then losing miserably in the second and third. The closer I got to my goal, the more I psyched myself out. I see the same thing happening with my health.

I'm on Day 30 (correction... this is an edit added later. Day 3. Not 30. I wrote this with a bit too much excitement, I guess) of Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. She is kicking my @$$. Someone at work joked that I'm walking like the Tin Man. I'm back to eating healthy crap, not unhealthy crap. I start classes again in a few days. I will again be scarce on my blog; but I will not be absent.

And I have a Caribbean cruise booked for this May. I've got 5 months. Go.